Living Simply… Parenting by Instinct

I visited my family down south earlier this month. I realized this morning I hadn’t blogged about it yet. We stayed with my mom and dad for one week. It was a good visit. Both my sisters came too, my middle sister with her little ones so my boys had playmates, and they played really well together. That Sunday we had a barbecue with all my relatives from both my parents’ families, many of whom had never seen Xander and hadn’t seen Austin for almost two years. We went to the zoo on Thursday with my dad too which was nice. I think the kids were a bit too young for the zoo, my boys seemed to tune it all out after a while; Charity’s little guys seemed more into it. Our new-to-us double stroller got a good workout anyway. The driving part was the worst. Austin got a bit of a bug on Wednesday and threw up a few times. We just figured it was too much sun (after all the temperature from home to my folks is like the difference between early spring and late summer) but when Xander spent the whole trip north to my in-laws throwing up we figured maybe a bug was going around. He was much better the next day but unfortunately, I caught it too. I spent most of the day in my room at my in-laws trying to make sure they didn’t get it. But all in vain, they too caught the bug a few days later. But mysterious illness aside it was a very good trip. 

Today, to put my husband’s mind at ease I agreed to meet with the midwife just once. Well, I’m glad I did. It reassured me with regard to my being drawn to UC. The appointment was about 20 minutes long. She had met me twice before when I had seen her in December for that pregnancy prior to my miscarriage, so she knew my feelings about the "routine" prenatal testing. This time she didn’t even discuss them with me she just filled out the lab requestion forms and handed them to me. I fail to understand why these test are routine. I am not a IV drug user, I’m in a five and a half year monogmous relationship (and have had the STD tests with each of my prior children), I had a rubella booster with my first child, I don’t believe that glucose testing is valid and if the test is positive that treatment improves outcomes, I have had my blood typed with each child and with my D&C (but apparently she cannot just take my word for it) and it would be easier to obtain this information from visiting the adjoining office where the doctor who attended Xander’s birth practices. But what kills me the worst is that I am not given a choice in this matter. I am just expected to turn myself up at the hospital lab with two toddlers in tow when my health care provider orders me to. Does OHIP give her more money for each additional prenatal test ordered? Does she have to provide paperwork to OHIP to keep her licence? And if so why could a waiver from me not suffice?? Truly, this makes me even more sure I do not need a birth attendant who I will continually need to battle with all through my pregnancy and birth for my rights.

Nic has made me agree to one more meeting with her to see if we can come to an agreement (so if we need back up we don’t need the hospital) but I know what will happen, she is too enmeshed in the medical model to truly trust birth I think. She only does about four homebirths a year; most of her practice is hospital based.